Sunday, November 30, 2008

Busy Weekend...

..but it's been an enjoyable one.

I am embracing this new life I want to take hold of. We spent the whole day Friday at home, never got dressed either. Stayed in my pjs all day long. After hubby went to work, I got the strength and energy to exchange our broken TV in the bedroom with my son's in his room that he never uses anyway. Our TV blew out one of it's color tubes so we were watching orange,blue, and some awkward color tv, never true color. After watching tv like that for 4 months, I finally got it changed out. We went from a 35 inch to a 19 inch but it's worth it to watch something on tv in real color instead of the way we were before. Not sure if the bruises were worth it though. LIfting a tv by myself on my thighs may not have been the smartest move but I'll deal with it. My thighs now have bruises all the way across them and they are tender to the touch and walking is a major feat in the morning. Live and learn....

Saturday Arielle and I went to Weight Watchers, bought some office supplies at Office Max, ate breakfast at Mc'ds, saw the movie Twilight(awesome movie), and then came home. I went to the laundromat and did three loads of laundry, got gas, went to Aldis and bought milk, and then came home again. I went into the basement and searched through dozens of pictures only to realize that my little project of organizing stuff in the basement was going to take a whole lot of time and patience. There is so much clutter(17 years of kids papers from school, pictures, etc...) that I have accumulated in the past 20 years...It's going to be a MAJOR undertaking to get that done.

Tomorrow is December. We woke up this morning to snow. Not heavy sticky stuff but the cars were covered in white....ugh...I hate winter....give me the other three seasons any day over winter....

Tomorrow is December. The first day of the week is the first day of the new month. Perfect launching off point to a new streamlined household budget, a new way of living, and a new outlook on the future. We'll see how this fares....

Till later!

Friday, November 28, 2008

Guess who is NOT shopping Black Friday???

I will be in my basement sorting through old pictures, and memories from years past. One thing my job did teach me is a new filing system that I want to incorporate into my household clutter. I'll have Arielle help me since I know she likes seeing pictures of herself and I have stuff down there from Jessi and Allen from when they were little. I know she'll love seeing those things. I may cry seeing all of it but when it's organized and looking better than a container full of scribbled on papers, it'll make me happy that I do have these memories still intact.

Hope that everyone's Thanksgiving was a nice holiday. We spent time with family so it was nice. Arielle and I cuddled in bed after coming home and watched Nim's Island. Good kid movie, love Jodie Foster and Abigail Breslin. I fell asleep from 7pm -about 1:30am. Figures that is why I am up at 3am writing in my blog. LOL!

If I find any earth shattering memories (pictures), I'll scan them and maybe make a little memory page. We'll see.

Don't spend too much tomorrow. Our Christmas is going to be bare bones this year...gotta pay down debt and not use those nasty credit cards. I'm aiming to stick to that little "new life" goal...

Happy Day!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

I'm unemployed....for 5 days...

and then I sub for the school district. I won't bore you with the details of my last day, but I left crying and I will miss a few select people. The rest of them...well, they can work at their job and not worry about me anymore.

Onwards and upwards!

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I am most thankful for the friends I have, the people I have met the past year, the lessons I have learned, and the trials that have taught me valuable things about myself that I did not know before.

Who else is shocked to realize that next week is December? *Seeing hands raised*. Yes, me too. Where did it go? I have gone shopping but my budget is considerabley smaller than last year and the economy is one of the reasons why. My angels will have one big present (already bought), 3-4 small ones and 2-3 will be clothes. Sorry guys, but this year it must be that way....

I already want January to be here. But with December starting on a Monday.. maybe I can pretend that it's the start of something new...yeah, that is what I am going to do. Monday, Dec 1 will be a new start....LOL!

Ask me again December 10 and see how I am progressing in my "new" life.


Sunday, November 23, 2008

I'm not Bipolar! Am I? No, I'm not....

I just have bad days and good days. Saturday was a good day turned bad by a series of events that I won't go into and I went to bed crying. Today I woke up ok and then went to church and heard talks on gratitude and thankfulness and I felt better about my life and all it has in it. I saw friends that I love and they showed that they care about me too. It was nice so I came home content. Tonight I am trying to make up with a friend of mine who was caught on the bad side of my pity party yesterday and I want to apologize but Yahoo messenger is being stupid and her cell is off and I don't know if she is getting the messages I left her and UGH! Maddening!

I'm sorry, I love you and we'll work this out....

I spent 45 minutes talking to a cell phone tech guy trying to fix my voice mail. I finally got fed up but then just as I was about to hang up, he tried one more thing and it finally worked. Thank goodness. I had no caller ID, voicemail and I couldn't text anyone. Now it's fixed and I am so happy.

I have three more days that I have to get up and go to my place of employment. I have to get 9 client files ready. A couple of these clients have a crapload of documents that have to be taken care of after the appointment so by 1pm Monday, I will be so ready to get out of there. I also have to make and party on Wednesday while I clear out my desk and pack everything from my cubicle into my car. It's going to be a bad day! Plus on top of all that, my dear beloved sister is having heart surgery on Wednesday and I am scared to death for her. I can't lose my best friend in all this too. She and I have gotten so close. I'd hate to have anything happen to her.

So, to be fair and objective....I am not bipolar, just have a load of stuff in my life right now to deal with. No wonder my moods are up and down. I hate change and I have my fill of it coming up this week..


Saturday, November 22, 2008

Lazy Saturday....

I am basking in the limelight of my last week working at a firm that no more than three months ago was my ticket into a life long love of hard work, desire to help people and seeing the good in helping clients get the most out of their money. That dream is all but shattered. I was naive, stupid, and looking into a rose colored mirror.

It's funny how when we enter a period of our life thinking it is going to get us one thing and then time and life takes a hold and changes it into something nothing like you had imagined.

December 1st, I go back to a job that I have done on and off for 6 years. Back to the school district. Sometimes I love it and sometimes I hate it but right now, it's all I have left to keep me afloat financially until another job opportunity comes along.

I have come to realize that working in a school environment is what I want to do. Probably high school age because most times I can still be found to look young enough to be mistaken for one of the students. Now, that is funny! I'm flipping 38 years old! Thanks to my parents who gave me young looking genes.

I'll apply to jobs after the year ends...When the retirees are leaving and jobs are open and maybe when the economy doesn't look so bleak!

Just another link in this twisted and crazy long chain I call life.

Til later...

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Plans For The Weekend...

1.) Sleep
2.) Go to Weight Watchers
3.) Go back to sleep
4.) find a great sweet potato side dish recipe to take to the work potluck.
5.) Take an afternoon nap
6.)Do laundry
7.) Talk to a cople of friends online and go to bed early

Maybe if I sleep this weekend, I'll sleep this blasted cold away. Heavily medicated and full of knock out pills and Vicks on my chest maybe will kick it.

We'll see. At least now I can talk. Monday-Wednesday I had no voice or what was there, was froggy and hoarse and hurt to try and deliver. Now the cold is in my chest and kills me whenever I cough, which is alot and at the worst possible times. Breathing in and then chewing on a breastick and coughing does not mix! Hurts!

So, if you are by your computer, find me on facebook or IM me on yahoo or ICQ, or whatever.

Have a good evening. Til later...

Job Update

Well, my boss and I sat down yesterday morning to discuss the job situation. He said that the way the business was going, he needed to change a few things in his business life in order to see if he could do any better than he has done in the past 3 months, which is totaly lousy in the production area. So we decided that he would let me go but to make it easier on me, it'd be my decision, which I told him was fine and I'd write him a resignation letter. So I still need to get that done. End date of employment. The Wednesday before Thanksgiving.

How do I feel about this? Better. Ever since the announcement of this impending decision on November 4, there have been things happening in my life that I needed this change. Again. For a person who hates change, I am sure doing a lot of it these days. Things have fallen into place so that this is good for me.

I do have a job to do instead of this one. I called the school district and got reinstated as a sub so I am on the call list for Decmeber 1st. I don't miss a date in between and I can make almost 1/2 the income I made at the Financial firm. I cut down on expenses and will make it work. December and January are both good months for paychecks since both months have longer weeks. I get 7 paychecks in Dec aand 7 in January since 2 paychecks (hubby and Child support) are 26 weeks in the year. CS falls in December and hubby falls in January. I get my last paycheck from boss Dec 1 and I get my first paycheck from subbing in January. I should still be able to stash a substantial savings into a hidden account and let it sit for awhile. Even with Christmas around the corner (CRAP!) We'll still be ok.

I had a friend ask me to send him my resume. I told him that for now I was going to wait until Spring, I hate fighting snow and bad cold weather in my car and I now don't have to deal with that, not this year, anyway. If I sub at the school, I'll need another income for the summer months but until then, I'll just do what I have to here at home and the school system has 15 dys off for Winter break so I get to enjoy my kids the whole time and not have to shuffle them off to a babysitter while I am at work. It all works out for the best with me and the kids so that is what counts.

My days now will be getting up this early (5:45am) taking a shower in case I get called to work. If I don't get called, I go back to bed. The latest I'll be home is 4pm where as before it was 5:30-6pm every night.

I found out I am not a 40 hour a week type of person. Not with the kids still being at home. I need to be home for them. They need me and I want to be here for them. I did find out that my son's grades could probably make a step up in the math and reading area if I supervise his after school activity a little more close.

So, that is my "not so tiny" update. I just had to vent and give my self a reminder that this is a good thing. I'll miss the people I work with but I've got the list of numbers and I'll stay in touch. Thanks for reading this far.

Have a great day, everyone!

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

Guess who lost a tooth...

The tooth fairy is coming to my house tonight. Arielle lost her very first tooth in school this morning. Her tooth behind it erupted over a month ago and is starting to push forward so I am glad that the obstacle is gone. We have inspected her mouth and it's wiggly little white teethies and I suspect I will be updating with Tooth Fairy briefings fairly frequently.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

If Not One Thing, It's Another...

Now that my emotional health has recovered somewhat, my physical health declines. My throat started hurting on Thursday and I watched it. Friday was better and yesterday it started up again. When I woke up last night, to yell at hubby to come to bed, I could not talk and my throat killed me. Today, I am in pain, and my day is shot because I needed to do stuff at church and now I can't. I need to rest and make sure that I am ready for the long week. I have tons of stuff to do at work and being sick does not fit into my schedule nor do I have any sick time to use. I hate being sick...and then having to deal with all the weekly stuff too. Oh boy, I dread this....

Til later...

Saturday, November 15, 2008

My Saturday Plans....NOT!

I was going to have such a wonderful time today along with errands and laundry piling up. I slept in, which felt really good and then pried myself out of bed to go to Weight Watchers. I gained .6lbs but I'll fix that this week. I then came home and was getting ready for my party with my coworkers. We were getting together to celebrate a coworkers new house and to scrapbook and start making Christmas decorations for the office and our families. All went well until we went to tbe babysitters to drop Arielle off. They weren't home. Not a soul around. Called them on my cell. we went back home and decided to just call the coworker and tell her that I was not coming! SUCKS!! I was so looking forward to hanging out with my new friends. (insert bad words) That is how I feel about that whole situation!

Arielle and I went to Aldis and another store and got groceries and then came back home to unpack the groceries. Now she is watching tv and I still have to go do laundry sometime this evening.

Good thing last night went so splendidly well. I had a wonderful time talking to a couple of friends of mine online...and then another friend called me on the phone and we talked for awhile. After that phone call, I gathered up Arielle and took her to bed and then I took the remote and turned on a DVR recording and promptly fell asleep.

The boy just told me he needs craft supplies for a project that he needs to start for school. It's due in 11 days so we still have time to get the supplies. Thank goodness it's not due on Monday!

Well, I better go do the laundry I can fold it and put it away before I need it again. I'll be back later. Life is coming back together, for the most part. I hate being that down that nothing cheers me up. Good thing it only lasts a little while.

Til later.....

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Coming out to share a piece of talent...not mine....

When I got back from New York City, I contacted a friend of mine about drawing a picture of my trip with the people I went with. This is what he came up with...

His name is Rick and he is fast becoming a good friend. Thank you so much Rick, for doing this for me. You can see more of his work and ask for your own special piece of artwork by going here. My trip to New York was very special and I wanted to remember it in a most unique way...I think Rick did a wonderful job! As soon as the job chaos settles down, I will be letting him create more artwork for me.

Back to my happy place...full of my favorite music, colorful flowers, cute fuzzy little animals, sunshine and rainbows....see you later.....

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Going To a Happy Place!

I found something today that has re-ignited a passion for a lost art and love of mine that has been out of my life for far too long. It's been quite a while but I am going to dive whole heartedly into it and see if it can make some of the bad go away, or seem to go away.....

If I am not around much...don't worry...I'm just trying to find myself again...Have fun!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

The Goals That We Make In Life

I have made a goal. In 5 years I will be out of debt. Easy enough, right? Get a job, keep that job and success......yeah, if it works out that way. On my way to success and serenity....

Funny how people make these goals one day and actually think they are going to succeed to this goal. There's one thing that most people dont count on as an

I thought my life was set in stone 6 months ago with graduating college and getting on with my career. Now, with a job that I loved up in the air, and numerous relationships being so confusing and complicated, I barely can tell what day it is, let alone focusing on the goal to get up in the morning. All I know is that I am making through a minute at a time and trying to focus on what is most important in my life. Mainly my family, and keeping my sanity while surviving...

Why does being an adult have to be so hard sometimes....If you are also having trouble with what life is giving you right now, look at this picture and float to another place, a happier place...and maybe things will look different in the morning.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Sunday Scramblings...

Last night was just perfect. After I did the things I had to do outside of the house, I quietly relaxed in the midst of my mess and kept my sanity. I talked to some people online that made my mess go away for awhile. I'll do the same thing today. Probably. The dishes are done, the laundry is clean so for the next week, there is tons of food in the house, and I'll just pick up where I see clutter and take care of it that way. If I lose my job, I'll do a thorough cleaning and really get this house ready for the new year of changes. Right now, I am just gathering energy to live and survive and that's enough. Nobody here is complaining except maybe the cats because they never got used to the time change....and I am feeding them an hour later than usual. Poor kitty cats. Pictures of the kids have been taken down. Wait until next year for more.

Life is what you make of it and sometimes you just have to give it to God and let Him handle the mess. He can have mine for awhile....

Have a great Sunday.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Saturday Things To Do List

GO to Weight Watchers-check-lost a total of 17 pounds, made goal, 10% and my lifetime membership, that is a whole huge feat in WW language! Yeah for me!

Go to Bank-check-bills can now be paid
Go to Laundromat and do 2 loads-check-clean clothes, yeah!
Go grocery shopping-check-and under budget for the week, yeah!
Clean living room and vacuum-nope
Clean kids rooms and sweep-nope-
Clean bathroom and deoderize-nope-
Clean kitchen, sweep and mop-nope-
Put out hamburger for dinner-nope-asked hubby to get Taco Bell. He's so good.
Fix dinner for hubby-see above-
Try and relax a little-spent a leisurely afternoon talking to a dear friend.
Catch up on stuff taped on DVR.-later tonight....and tomorrow.

I'll get to the rest of this eventually. It'll still be there...

Friday, November 7, 2008

Almost the weekend

....only a few more hours and then I can get some work done around the house and rest and relax for the next week coming up.


Thursday, November 6, 2008

On the bright side.... went better than the past few days. I did corner my boss though and tell him how I felt regarding his little eval with me. If this does not work out, I told him that God has always provided me with help or another window to the future so he was happy about that. I am not looking for that and my head is still in the game of my present job but if I have to, I do have a plan B.

I want to thank my coworkers who have surrounded me in support of my feeling bad at work. I am taking every one of their names home with me when and if something happens with this job. I did not know the friendships I had there until today. One of them actually starting telling corny knock knock jokes in an effort to make me laugh. Love ya, girlie!

You do not know how much you are blessed in life until you are tried and brought down to almost nothing....Thanks, to my "blog followers". I love you guys too. You make my day! Thank you!!!!

I am feeling much better!!!!

Maybe it's a sign.....

of better things to work for....

I know right now I am not happy in life and it needs to change. I thought I was but after my trip to NYC, things just steadily got worse in my life, both personal and professional. My brain is going places where it's never been before and I don't know if that means starting over or what.....but I'm confused as anyone could be...and I am not happy with what is happening now in my life.

My one question is, why can't I be happy for more than a month or two? Do I really actually know what happiness is? Right now, what I am feeling, is not happiness.......and in this stage of my life, I really should be happy....

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Well, it very well could be the unemployment line..... three weeks, I'll know for sure......

My boss is looking for a scapegoat to blame the lack of production with our clients. To tell the truth, it's neither one of our faults. The economy has it so messed up that the clients are pulling funds out of every account they have and the boss and I are both suffering because of it. I know he can't pay my salary if this keeps up but to give me a bad eval and blaming me for something that is not my fault, it's not fair....and I have been crying all afternoon because of it.

I guess my next course of action is redoing the bills in case this does happen. I guess I'll go back to the school district subbing and look for another job that way again.....

Life isn't fair....Guess John or Barack will be saying the same thing tonight after the results come in.

I did vote by the way...crying......but I

Pray for

...I have my probationary evaluation today. I had to grade myself yesterday and we are "discussing" that today. I know I love my job and I know I am doing as well as can be expected so I should not be scared....but I am.......I hate evaluations and I can't stand constructive criticism......I just can't take it.....

Wish me luck.....maybe he'll tell me how much of a raise I am getting now that probabtion is almost over or where to apply for unemployment.......we'll see.....

Oh and you might want to pray for our country today too.....

It's gonna be a roller coaster today! I bet we won't find out who wins until next week.....

Monday, November 3, 2008

Interesting weekend

Actually got caught up on things that I had put off so I call that a success. I slept a lot, caught up on some kid time with Arielle and Allen and they were appreciative of their mother's attempt to spend some time with them.

Arielle and I saw High School Musical 3. I really hate to say this but I really love this movie. I love musicals in general, even the B rated ones. I just love the goofy songs and lyrics, and everything about them. There are only a few I don't like and I won't mention thier names. Arielle loves to sing and dance so it fits into our realm of things to do together.

Allen got an early Christmas present and he is forever grateful. Even hugged me which was a very pleasant surprise, giving that he is a teenager of 13. Hugging moms just is not cool anymore! I'll wrap up the box and give it to him On Christmas Day. Makes my shopping easier and not so time stressed.

Anyone have a countdown to Christmas yet? 52 days or something like that??? Oh my gosh, where does the time go??? It just flies....I just surpassed 2 months at my job. That went fast! And I still love it although there are a few things about getting up so darn early that are beginning to wear on me.....UGH!

Hope every one has a great week and makes it thier own. I intend on taking one day at a time and making every minute the best it can be. Here's hoping.....LOL!

Oh and go vote tomorrow. It may make the difference in a very stressful election.....

Saturday, November 1, 2008


October was full of super highs and super lows so I am wanting to make November a steady stream of "I like life!"

So far, I got paid today, on a Saturday so that was a definite good. I worked for it so I am happy that I got my just do. I love my new salary. It gives me wiggle room for the month if I need it. With Christmas coming up, there is my wiggle room.

Arielle and I are spending some much needed time together today. We are seeing High School Musical 3 and then we're going to the mall for some candle smelling fun.

Allen does not want to go with us so he'll be home doing what he wants to do best....

Hope you all have a wonderful Saturday! We intend to.